Psalm 42

Psalm 42

As the hart panteth for the water brooks, so panteth my soul for Thee, O God. 2My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God; when shall I come and appear before God? 3My tears have been my meat day and night, while they continually say unto me, "Where is thy God?" 4When I remember these things, I pour out my soul within me, for I had gone with the multitude; I went with them to the house of God, with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept holyday.

5Why art thou cast down, O my soul? And why art thou disquieted within me? Hope thou in God, for I shall yet praise Him for the help of His countenance.

LAST NIGHT AT THE NURSING HOME

"LAST NIGHT AT THE NURSING HOME"

hmmmm...sounds like a title for a comedy? drama? not quite a horror flick but definitely disturbing and definitely comical at times.

There is a well known "time of the day" for dementia patients that is called "sundowners syndrome". Medically, it is a mystery still but it causes people to become more disoriented, agitated, etc...in the evenings. Imagine yourself having to care for and get dozens of people ready for bed (who may not stay in bed) who are angry, agitated, and scared? And in different states of disability?

I often get asked why my sister and I stay so long at the nursing home. Well, we both believe that the nursing home is helping us with our responsibility, not the other way around. We help and feel like our time is volunteering in this time of our life. We usually share the week. Chris is there with mom from lunch time to getting ready for bed time, 3 and a half days and I am there three and a half days. Since we live about 20 minutes from the nursing home instead of breaking up the day we just stay there. (gas costs and all.) We may leave for a bit and do errands in town while mom is napping etc...but we have learned how to just provide that company for her as well as supervise her care. It helps us because now at least we have a more predictable schedule and we can get away for a time if needed for our own appointments etc...And we have a regular sleep routine.

Last night was a typical scenario that is a case in point. Two newer younger gals were on our hall caring for residents. They were way behind in their tasks after the dinner hour. ( We really do like this nursing home. It has workers who really care and do a great job, however like everything else these days, cuts of staff and services are the norm! They do their best under adverse conditions. ) Usually the worst cases get put in bed first. If I am out and about with mom just walking her around we end up having to rescue patients about to get up with buzzers blazing or who are just generally agitated and looking for things to do. Its rather comical in a tragic way. Most are just getting over tired and need to be attended to but have to wait until their turn.

Well, this is getting overly long but I think you get the idea why being there at bedtime is most important and setting a tone for mom with prayer and memory verses. I came back to this post to delete it but it does give others an idea of just how challenging a nursing home can be and how it is important to us to make sure mom feels safe. She is lucid but not able to do anything with her feet or arms so it is doubly frustrating for her waiting for help. So we are there. Some of the dementia patients are quite adept at standing, rummaging through things and running around with their wheelchairs. Mom isn't. So thank God that we can be there for her and yet they are there for us as well. I have felt so frustrated with this choice that we have made and sometimes remember that God provided for us. It was out of our hands. I am trying to find a way to feel grateful for this time that we have, unique as it is, and not worry about the future.

A beautiful day

It was a gloriously beautiful fall day in the UP today. I spent it on the road with a friend travelling to Marquette for shopping, talking and stopping for lunch. This time of year never ceases to amaze me with its beauty. What a wonderful reminder of change and the necessity for all things to grow, then to age, then to die and to live once again. Its amazing how nature reflects the very character and wisdom of God. He told us that we cannot see the majesty of nature and deny HIM.

I feel a certain sadness too, knowing this beauty will end and the trees will be bare and the contents of the woods will expose their skeletons in the "closet" and the cold winds will replace the warm. But there are days of beauty yet...the awesome first snow, cleansing, purifying, and covering up the cold hard ground.

Yes life is to be appreciated in all its seasons, its comforts and discomforts, "to everything there is a time and a purpose under heaven....".